Jason Whitlock is a Turd.

That is actually Jason Whitlock doing what he does best. Sleeping.

So here I am, logging on to check my Fantasy Football squads (by the way, you're losing this week Cover3 and Sneakerhoes) and an article running along the top catches my eye. It's by Jason Whitlock, who is a turd. I click to see what it says, because he's backing Keyshawn Johnson for his interview with Chad Johnson last week. Jason Whitlock doesn't disappoint. In his article, titled The 10 Truths, he proves, yet again, that he's a hater. Here's what I'm talking about:



10. Let me tip my hat to ESPN's Keyshawn Johnson for his wonderful, tension-filled interview with Chad Johnson last weekend.

Keyshawn confronted Mr. Bojangles in a way that the majority of broadcasters and journalists wouldn't dare. Keyshawn is receiving some criticism for the interview because you could argue that Keyshawn — sans the elaborate TD celebrations — was a disruptive locker-room force during his playing career much like Chad Johnson. Remember, Keyshawn is the guy who jealously attacked Wayne Chrebet for no reason.

That bit of hypocrisy didn't bother me because Keyshawn is no longer a player. He's a member of the media, and he performed his job beautifully. That's all I can ask as a viewer.

Well, I do wish Keyshawn had pointed out to Chad that the Bengals haven't won a damn thing in Chad's era. In his one playoff game, Chad melted down at halftime with the Bengals holding a lead simply because he hadn't caught enough passes. Chad Johnson foolishly believes he's a "winner."

There's no evidence of that.



My Thoughts:

OK, so now Chad Johnson is Mr. Bojangles? Well I have to admit, I've heard the name Mr. Bojangles, but not sure the origin, so let me go check it out...

according to wikipedia, Mr. Bojangles was the subject of a song in the late 60's who was an alcoholic tap dancer the creator of the song met in prison.

Well guy, I highly doubt Chad Johnson is an alcoholic, and also, since he's been in the league, he's never been in any kind of trouble, much less prison. Chad dances, but so do dozens of other people who score touchdowns in the NFL. It's not like you can catch Ocho Cinco just bustin a move on the sidelines at any given moment. He has even stopped dancing after he scores, because he states "What is there to celebrate about? We're losing. Once we start winning again, I'll start celebrating." Sounds like he's got his head on his shoulders to me.

He backs Keyshawn because he's a member of the media who stood up to Chad Johnson who apparently gives Jason Whitlock boners mixed with fits of rage at the very site of the gold grilled receiver.

He says Keyshawn's history as a cry baby and a locker room nuisance doesn't matter because he's not a player anymore. That's like a former pot head criticizing someone for smoking a blunt. Like "damn, just last week you were puff puff passin with us son?!" Further than that, Keyshawn acts like a baby constantly on air, in regards to the teams he left on less than favorable terms. Namely, the Bucs, and Panthers. Watch Sunday NFL countdown this Sunday (11 am Eastern time) on ESPN and listen to him. Seriously. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me Keyshawn doesn't have a single good thing to say about either ball club. He deserves to be called out on that. Not saying that the interview between the two Johnson's wasn't entertaining, but come on.

"Chad Johnson foolishly believes he's a winner."

Oh, I'm sorry. See, I thought averaging 1,154 yards a season, and 7 TDs a year over 6 years was such a horrible feat. Four pro bowl appearances in the past 6 years, along with a sure nod this year makes 5 in 7 years. That's terrible production. God awful, I tell you.







9. ESPN's version of "60 Minutes" — "E:60" — has a chance to be one of the most entertaining shows on TV, if it would stick to just airing the "pitch meetings."

Based on reporter/Around the Horn debater Michael Smith's pitch of a story on Chad Johnson, E:60 might be the most honest, unintentionally funny show on cable.

Let me say this off the top: I'm a Michael Smith fan. He's a young brother with talent and passion for the profession. But developing, nurturing and guiding talented young brothers and sisters is not ESPN's strength.

Overexposing them, putting them in positions they're not ready for and pushing them to be more like Stuart Scott is what ESPN does best. Stephen A. Smith was well on his way to being one of the most important sports journalists today until ESPN executives snatched him and put him in position to fail with a TV talk show.

Is Michael Smith next? If he's caught on camera one more time trying to explain to a group of grown folks why Chad Johnson's shucking, jiving and bojangling are "easily one of the most compelling moments in pro football today, if not all of sports for that matter ... Like, everybody is watching to see what he's going to do."

The look on Lisa Salters' face as Smith pitched this load of garbage was priceless. Watch the 11-minute pitch video. I can't do it justice. Seriously, at one point Salters' gasped in disgust and the room broke into nervous laughter when Smith tried to put a positive spin on Johnson having four kids by three different women.



My thoughts:

OK, Jason Whitlock, you're a bum. Let's say this first and foremost. You write for the Kansas City Star. You are not on ESPN. You write for fox sports, which is about 1/10th as popular (maybe) as ESPN. You used to be on ESPN, but you were let go, so you hold a grudge. I see through you, Jason Whitlock. You're a window. A big ass window, but clear none the less. Your claim that ESPN doesn't nurture, and over exposes young black men and woman is a little retarded to me. You see, I thought that by giving these young men and woman considerable face time, you were opening them up to future opportunities that they probably would never have gotten. I will give you that Stephen A. Smith's show failed, but was it because the higher ups at ESPN wanted to shit on Stephen A. Smith by giving him a talk show that wasn't all that great? If that was true, do you think Stephen A. would still be on ESPN all the time, like he is? I highly doubt it. Not to mention, he still hosts a show on ESPN radio. See:



And whats up with all the Bojangles talk? He must have ate at Bojangles right before he wrote the article. (We don't have Bojangles down here in FL, but it is some FIIIIIRE food)






5. Has anyone asked Roger Goodell what precautions he'll take to ensure that the Pro Bowl — if moved to the mainland — won't turn into NBA All-Star Weekend?
Goodell is allegedly considering taking the Pro Bowl away from Honolulu, moving it to the week before the Super Bowl and playing the game close to the Super Bowl location. This is stupid.

The NFL's all-star game is the most non-competitive game of all the all-star contests. It might as well be two-hand touch. You don't want to bring more media attention to this non-event. The players will get ripped for not trying, just like the NBA's game.

Plus, you risk having every hip hop entertainer hooking up with their favorite hip hop football player and throwing a party, which will invite every hip hop wannabe gangsta to descend on the host city and loiter.

The beauty of the Pro Bowl in Honolulu is that most football fans can't pile into a car and drive to the game. The Pro Bowl is exclusive. About a dozen media members, a select group of retired players and groupies with actual jobs regularly attend the Pro Bowl. The players stay in a secluded resort. The setup is perfect. Goodell should think long and hard before making this move. He's going to create a major headache.



My thoughts:



That's you on the far left, Jason Whitlock, and that's Tech N9ne in the back right. That's the 57th Street Road Dogs, a rap group from Kansas City (or so it read on the caption of the picture) I can feel the hate in your heart, big fella. It's oozing out of your mouth, and fingers through the keyboard right in to my view. Now, I don't agree with Roger Goddell moving the Pro Bowl to the week before the Super Bowl because the players that are in the Big Game, won't play the week before, and that's unfair to the fans. No matter how much or how little effort is actually given during the game. But, arguing moving it within the 48 continuous states would bring an element these cities wouldn't want just comes off as pure hatred.

"you risk having every hip hop entertainer hooking up with their favorite hip hop football player and throwing a party, which will invite every hip hop wannabe gangsta to descend on the host city and loiter."

This just in! Every hip hop entertainer can fly to whatever city he or she wants to and mingle with these players any time they want. The wannabe gangstas are in every city in America, and also have access to these stars every week. STOP HATING ON HIP HOP YOU FUCK! Tell these men to take responsibility for their own actions. Hip Hop can't make you do a damn thing. Also, I know you've seen the commercials on TV..the NFL and the United Way have a partnership. Imagine what kind of projects and the positive publicity that would come from having the all stars of the league all working one one project, even if it's only for one day. There are possibilities of something going wrong every single week of the NFL season, and moving the Pro Bowl around just increases revenue and the number of fans who can go to the game and see it in person.